Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
