scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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