Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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