What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
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