This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
