Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
