i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
A bitchslap is in order.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize