Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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