i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
