I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize
