Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
