her vagine was all disorganized.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
