Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Green mimosas i think yes
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
