A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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