I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
