He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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