No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
