I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize