we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
