So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
