She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Acid is not a monday night drug
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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