i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize