Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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