dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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