Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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