My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
