what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
