She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
