Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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