Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize