I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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