I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
