He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
