No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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