Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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