can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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