I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
