I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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