Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
