We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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