What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
