I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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