It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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