He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
