Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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