thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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