Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize