I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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