yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize