Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
My sheets look like a crime scene.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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