If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
