I can tuck mytits in my pants
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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