On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize